Five Year Slumps And Summiting Everest

The dark cloud that surrounded me must have showed up on my face, in my attitude or tone of voice, because a veteran officer pulled me aside and asked me what was going on. I am grateful that he did because it taught me something that I have never forgotten.

I told him I didn’t want to go to work anymore. It had lost its glamour and grit. All I could see was the politics, the bean-counting, a thankless public, a blind administration, and all my effort that had come to nothing. I was Sisyphus, condemned to roll a stone up hill only to have it roll back down, over and over again, for all eternity.

Slow Fade

He told me that I was probably in a five-year slump. He said that most cops go through a slump about every five years, that it was normal, and that I wasn’t crazy. In one sense it was a revelation; like scales falling from my eyes or like looking at the world with my first pair of glasses. It felt like I could see for the first time in a long time. His insight didn’t solve my problems, put money in my bank account, or cause people to appreciate me. What it did was give me clarity — perspective.

Finding myself in that slump wasn’t because a switch had flipped or that something suddenly came over me. It had been a slow, gradual process, like a bank account being drawn over and over again until it was empty. Maybe you’ve felt the same way.

Magic Number

So what’s the deal with five years, anyway? Is it always five years, or could it take four years or even seven? There’s no formula, so put your calculator away. It may not be an exact science, but after almost 18 years on the job I’d say five years is a pretty good average. It may just be that it takes about that long for there to be enough repetition, enough build up, and enough negative experiences to tip the scales.

Take Note

Look at your career and your time on the job. Take note. Where are you at? Look at your attitude. How do you feel as you pull into the parking lot, walk into the building, or put the key in the cruiser ignition? Are you heading for a slump or are you in a slump already? In the words of Darth Vader: search your feelings.

Not to be a Debbie-downer, but if you’re not in a slump, you likely will be at some point. And if you are in one now, hang in there, there’s hope. Though I don’t have all the answers or a quick fix, allow me to offer some perspective of my own to help you prepare for one or climb out of the one you are in.

I. Commit

Decide ahead of time that regardless of how you are feeling, you will maintain your integrity and commitment to excellence. Don’t become an angry, disgruntled, corner-cutting slug. This will only make things worse and could eventually cost you your job and reputation.

II. Consult

Meet with a fellow officer that you trust, who has more time on, and who does their job with excellence. Let them know what’s going on and brainstorm together. That veteran officer may be able to help you see through the fog to what’s on the other side.

III. Reflect

Take some time off and reflect. It could be just a three or four day weekend at home; it doesn’t have to be an extravagant vacation or pilgrimage to a mountaintop monastery. Just intentionally set aside uninterrupted time to reflect, journal, pray, and talk it over with your spouse or a close friend.

IV. Remember

Reach deep into the recesses of your mind and remember why you took this job in the first place and all the possibility for adventure that lies ahead. My guess is there was something sexy about it or some attraction to action and adventure that caught your interest. It wasn’t all about righting wrongs and helping the helpless. Remembering your why could relight that fire.

V. Control

Control the controllable. Don’t worry about things that you cannot control — which is pretty much everything outside of your thoughts and behaviors. It is easy to allow ourselves to get overwhelmed by things outside of our control. When we focus on things outside our circle of influence, we become reactive victims who blame everything and everyone else. Focusing on what we can control will help us be proactive, not reactive.

VI. Move

Get a change of scenery. It could be a different shift, different route, different division, or a different department. Use the last five years of experience to guide you and to help inform your next five years. Your career choice may not be the problem. It may be that you are doing the right thing it’s just that you’re doing it in the wrong place.

Summiting Everest

This career can be like summiting Everest. Yes, it’s an adventure, but some days you’re bored to tears, other days you are terrified, and still many more that make you want to quit and turn back. It can be a long, slow journey plagued by doubt. Let me remind you that you chose a worthy profession — worthy on so many levels — with rewards that are not often tangible. Like summiting Everest, when you reach the top and survey the world beneath you, the view is worth it and the all toils are forgotten.

George Mallory, a great explorer who disappeared and died while summiting Everest in 1924, wrote, “If you cannot understand that there is something in man which responds to the challenge of this mountain and goes out to meet it, that the struggle is the struggle of life itself upward and forever upward, then you won’t see why we go. What we get from this adventure is just sheer joy. And joy is, after all, the end of life. We do not live to eat and make money. We eat and make money to be able to live. That is what life means and what life is for.”

Carry On

Few people understand what we do — why we go. I would argue that we who do the job are the only ones who truly understand it.  Those closest to us want to, but cannot. Though my wife has been with me since the beginning, and as much as she wants to understand what I do, she can understand it no more than I can understand what it’s like to be a woman (That sounded less weird in my head before I wrote it). That fact can lend itself to a sense of isolation and loneliness and steal our hope of ever escaping.

But there is hope and you are not alone. Try some of the suggestions outlined above or reach out to us at Johnny Tactical. It would by our privilege to serve you in any way that we can.

Five year slumps are normal. You’re not crazy. Let that sink in.
_______________________

Thanks for reading! Do you have a story that you think we could learn from and that you’d like to share with Johnny Tactical nation? Fill out the contact form and include your name, rank, and department, or email it to [email protected] and follow these guidelines:

• It must be a firsthand account
• True
• Have a lesson, principle, or tactic to apply
• Cleaned of names, dates, and places
• Include your call sign

 

If your story is selected and published in our blog you’ll get the credit using your call sign and we’ll send you a free Johnny Tactical morale patch.