Hello Doughnut, My Old Friend

Simon and Garfunkel’s The Sound Of Silence played as a hand raised a frosted doughnut toward a gaping mouth.  Suddenly, the words of the song morphed into, “Hello doughnut, my old friend, I’ve come to talk with you again…” Doughnut after doughnut is massacred leaving behind nothing but the crumbs of shame and regret.  Maybe next year will be the year of six pack abs, bulging biceps, and glutes you could bounce a quarter off of. Maybe next year…

A 2021 study conducted in the United Kingdom and Australia found that two-thirds of the participants abandoned their New Year’s resolutions within one month. And not only that, but more than half of them had made the same kind of resolutions the year before! Not surprisingly, most of the resolutions revolved around diet and exercise. Lead author of the study, Joanne M. Dickson, said those that failed to keep their resolutions were just too vague, having made resolutions like “get fit” or “exercise more.” In other words, within 30 days the majority of participants put down the kettle bell and picked up the doughnut — again.

What Happened?

So what happened and how can tactical operators like you and me avoid this vicious cycle? Well, one possibility could be to follow these two simple rules:

1. Don’t make New Year’s resolutions

2. See Rule Number One

Assuming you have more ambition than a loaf of bread, let’s explore some other options. In Charles Duhigg’s book Smarter Faster Better, he outlines a system developed by General Electric in the 1940’s that eventually became the gold standard of goal setting. GE later called them S.M.A.R.T. goals, and they provide the framework for actually accomplishing and exceeding your goals¹. It’s more than rah-rah-sis-boom-bah inspirational quotes and idyllic pictures you hang on the wall. It’s a nitty-gritty, simple, practical system that actually works. When you set a goal, make sure it is a SMART goal:

Specific – not vague or overly broad
Measurable – defined criteria used to track progress
Achievable – demonstrably within reach
Realistic – within the realm of possibility and achievable within the time limit
Timeline – have a deadline

According to the study we talked about, vague New Year’s resolutions were the number one reason why the participants failed. So if the participants changed their vague goal of “get fit” to a more specific goal like, “lose 30 pounds in six months” or “exercise for 30 minutes, three days a week” they would have had a much higher success rate because they had made a goal that was specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and had a timeline.

“But,” you argue, “that’s only half the battle. Anyone can make up a goal! Who’s to say they’ll actually do it?” And that, my tactical friends, is the hard part — moving from intention to execution. Enter Mel Robbins and the 5 Second Rule.

The 5 Second Rule

Robbins is a motivational speaker and best-selling author who stumbled upon the 5 Second Rule by accident after struggling with depression and anxiety for years. Her TEDx talk has millions of views and she is one of the most sought after speakers today. In her book aptly titled The 5 Second Rule², Robbins understands the gap between good intentions and execution — a gap that she believes is only about five seconds wide.

So, what is the 5 Second Rule? Yes, it’s also the limit to how long food is still edible after falling on the ground, but that is not what this rule is all about. The rule is simply this: The moment you have an instinct to act on a goal you must count backwards 5-4-3-2-1 and then physically move or your brain will stop you.

Counting backwards disengages the emotional part of your brain (the part that tells you, I don’t feel like it!) and engages the logical part of the brain, the prefrontal cortex. Robbins says that physical movement is the most important part of the rule because when you move your physiology changes and your mind follows. Robbins found through her research that as soon as you want to change — to break a bad habit or start a good habit — your brain goes to work to try to stop you. And if you don’t act within about five seconds, the window of opportunity closes, your brain wins, and the behavior you wanted to implement evaporates.

I won’t get into all the details here, but she explains it all in her book and how to apply the 5 Second Rule to improve your health, increase productivity, end procrastination, stop worrying, end anxiety, and build real confidence.

The Good News

This is all good news, because even if you’re one of the 66% who abandoned your goals or New Year’s resolutions, you have the opportunity to change that in the next five seconds. Start with writing down your goals following the SMART goal outline because that will give you a target to aim at. Then, the moment you have an instinct to act on that goal, count backwards 5-4-3-2-1 and then physically move.

It’s the first week of February, the new year ended over 30 days ago, where are you at with your goals?

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• Do you have good intentions but have trouble following through?
• Are you writing down your goals?
• Does hesitation sabotage your best laid plans?
• Are you willing to try something new?

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¹Charles Duhigg, Smarter Better Faster: The Transformative Power of Real Productivity (New York, 2016), 116-132.

²Mel Robbins, The 5 Second Rule: Transform Your Life, Work, and Confidence with Everyday Courage (USA, 2017), 29-36, 53,105-110, 242.