Reading The Riot Act

Starting over is never easy.

After spending seven years at my first police department, I made the decision to leave and go and work for another one. Making the move was one of the hardest decisions I had ever made. I didn’t like change, and still don’t, but the possibilities that the move opened up seemed worth the risk.

Starting Over

At the age of 32 I was starting over. That meant going through the department’s in-house academy, learning all their SOPs, having zero privileges and no seniority, feeling like a nobody, and going back through FTO.

When it came time to hit the road I found that I had a lot to learn. The city where I now worked was a lot larger than what I was used to and as I looked around I didn’t even know where to begin. It looked like crime was everywhere and the way in which calls were handled was a bit of a culture shock.

The Riot Act

On one particular day-shift I was driving around my route with my FTO who was riding shotgun. We saw someone driving like an idiot so we pulled them over. Everything checked out, they were having a bad day, and that was about all there was to it. We both agreed to send them on their way without any paperwork. As I pulled on the door handle to step out of my cruiser and give them the good news, my FTO told me, “Just read them the riot act and kick them loose.”

Me, confused: “The riot act?”

Him, somewhat annoyed: “Ya, just read them the riot act and kick them loose.”

Me, feeling like I’m missing something: “Okay. So, ummm, do you have a copy of the riot act I could borrow? I don’t think I have one.”

Him, in disbelief: “Are you serious right now?”

Me, not getting it: “What do you mean?”

Him, double-checking the stupid-factor: “You’re kidding me.”

Me, trying to be honest while still not getting it: “I’m not kidding. I really don’t have one.”

Him, realizing this is for real: “Hahahahhahahahahahaa!”

Disbelief

I sat there in the driver’s seat of the cruiser looking blankly over at my laughing FTO as tears streamed down his face. The driver of the car I stopped probably assumed I was developing writer’s cramp filling out a plethora of tickets based on how long they had now been waiting.

When my FTO finally composed himself he kindly explained that reading someone the riot act wasn’t a law, legal document, or department policy, it was just an expression. I tried explaining to him that I had never heard of it, but he refused to believe that a 32 year old didn’t know what that was.

But I didn’t.

My First Riot Act

Needless to say the driver was relieved when I returned with nothing but their license and registration in my hand. I sheepishly told them to drive safely as I handed them over, which was the entirety of the reading of my first riot act.

You learn something new every day.

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