The Hardest Person To Lead

Detectives think they know everything and are smarter than everyone else.

One Sunday morning a detective at my department was doing some surveillance on a case and went off on his own to track down his suspect. I guess he figured the suspect was not much of a threat because he used to be a tax accountant but had traded in his tax license for a license to kill his own brain cells with copious amounts of drugs. Let’s be real, there are few things less scary than a tax nerd. The guy was apparently living out of his former practice, smoking crack, and still preparing tax returns for unsuspecting clients while embezzling their money to fund his habit.

So Much For Quiet

This certain detective had an arrest warrant ready to go and parked across the street and out of the way to keep an eye on the suspect’s office to see if he could take him by surprise and make the arrest. Well, it wasn’t long before the bad guy came driving by, and when the detective turned on his blue lights the pursuit was on and heading the wrong way down a one way street.

A few quick left hand turns later and the former accountant had made a loop, bailed out of his car, and ran back into his office. So much for a quiet Sunday morning.

Surround, Call Out, and Ignore

Patrol units and a supervisor began arriving to set up a perimeter before calling the guy out. What was once a tax office had become a trap house, and one drug-addled person after another strolled out once the commands to surrender echoed over our PA system.

The detective had a position on the perimeter with a couple of patrol guys and the patrol supervisor. When the first addict staggered out of the office the supervisor told the detective to put him in cuffs, but the detective ignored it. He just kept talking to the guy, trying to debrief him I guess, to determine if his wanted person was still inside since some time had passed before Patrol showed up so he could have slipped out without being seen.

Cringe Worthy

At least two more times the sergeant told the detective to put the guy in cuffs, but each time his commands fell on deaf ears. It wasn’t until the detective was good and ready that the guy was finally handcuffed for everyone’s safety. The sergeant’s blood was boiling, and rightly so, after being completely ignored and frankly, disrespected, right in front of his own guys. These flipping detectives! I’m telling you, they are so arrogant.

I witnessed the whole cringe-worthy scenario play out first hand, and I am still embarrassed by it, because that detective was me.

Good News, Bad News

It’s kind of funny, not in a ha-ha sort of way, but more in an ironic sort of way. We can consume all the content, read all the books, go to all the training, love every idea and strategy of it all, but in the heat of the moment it can all go out the window. The problem was me, and the problem is you. When it comes to dealing with the person in the mirror there is good news and there is bad news. The bad news is that you are the problem, but the good news is that you are the solution.

Theory is great. Theory fills text books and fuels debates among the greatest minds on the planet, but theory only gets you so far. Putting that theory into practice, choosing to do the next right thing, is not only the hard part, it is also the difference between wanting to lead and being a leader. Unless and until you can lead yourself, you cannot lead anyone else.

The Hardest Person

I am the hardest person to lead. You are the hardest person to lead. That danged face looking back at you in the bathroom mirror is both the problem and the solution, and man is that frustrating. We have all the control and sometimes it feels like none of the control. We are a walking, talking oxymoron — oftentimes with an emphasis on moron.

The things that motivate us to act are as varied and sometimes unpredictable as we are; things such as pleasure or pain, greed or generosity, love or hate. That all may be true but though we can be driven by them, we are not our emotions or our mood. In Stephen Covey’s best-selling book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People (pp. 74-79) he points out that there are four things that separate us from the animals:

1. Self-awareness
2. Imagination
3. Conscience
4. Independent will

Not only that, but there is a gap between what happens to us (the stimulus) and what we do next (our response). In that gap between the stimulus and our response is where we get to decide what we do next. It is where we lead ourselves.

Deciding

To lead yourself you must decide to be led, to submit to a higher, better ideal. That decision is one that must be repeated over and over again, it is not a one-time thing. Some days will be easier than others, but nonetheless, it is a decision we get to make, and can make.

Majority Vote

To lead yourself you must cast a vote for the person you want to become. James Clear in his book Atomic Habits talks about making small changes, small choices, over time to achieve the explosive results that you want. Every time you are faced with a decision to go to the gym, to put down the donut, or to listen to your sergeant, you are in a sense at the polls about to cast a vote for the kind of person you want to be. And over time, the votes will be tallied and the majority vote will win.

Persistence Not Perfection

To lead yourself you must be persistent, not perfect. Spoiler alert: you are not perfect. And though it may be an admirable goal, it is not one that we can attain this side of Heaven. Persistence is not giving up, never relenting, always returning to our goals when we get off track — and we will get off track. Don’t spend too much time beating yourself up when you fall short, just make the necessary course corrections and try, try again.

Simple, Not Easy

Leading yourself so that you can lead others is simple, but not easy. It is a process, not a destination. You’re going to have good days and you’re going to have days like the one I had. And even though you are the hardest person you will ever lead, it will be worth it. You can do it.

__________________________

• How’s your leadership journey going?
• Have you been trying to lead others without first leading yourself?
• Which way is the majority of votes leaning?
• What do you have to do to stay on track?

__________________________

Thanks for reading! Do you have a story that you think we could learn from and that you’d like to share with Johnny Tactical nation? Fill out the contact form and include your name, rank, and department, or email it to [email protected] and follow these guidelines:

– It must be a firsthand account
– True
– Have a lesson, principle, or tactic to apply
– Cleaned of names, dates, and places
– Include your call sign

If your story is selected and published in our blog you’ll get the credit using your call sign and we’ll send you a free Live Tactical t-shirt!